When a guy says he doesn’t want to commit.

I met my ex on tinder. Yes, first of all I shouldn’t be on tinder if I wanted to meet decent guys. But yeah we all do such stupid things sometimes. Don’t we? In fact, I wasn’t attracted to him that much. But he sure charmed me with his personality. You can’t be fooled by a guy’s all so perfect personality and kindness sometimes ( yes girls listen carefully). I ignored him for one year, though he checked on me once in a while. Then I finally one day decided to meet him. Yes stupid me. But, his looks didn’t really make me attracted to him. I decided to not go on his looks. He was average looking. I decided that I would give him a chance. ( Damn I should have known that not-so-goodlooking-guys would turn out to be trouble too). Stupid me again. We hung out and yes he was perfect. He complimented me everytime he saw me. He said I was beautiful. He treated me like how a perfect gentleman would. His goodmorning messages were the first messages I saw when I wokeup ( I get up at 6:00am in the morning for college). So I definitely was all he thought of at night and the first person he thought about in the morning (or maybe I’m just foolish to think so). Then, I visited his house. But never had sex. Just made out. He had told me that his business partner\friend was abroad. So I guess maybe that was why he had so much free time to meet me regularly. I never had a complaint. Then one fine day, I stopped getting goodmorning messages. But he did mesage me during the day to check on me. I found out that his friend was back. We still met up again. But this time he tells me out of nowhere that he didn’t want me thinking we were dating and that he didn’t want any commitment. I thought I had done something wrong but he said it wasn’t like he was going to be seeing anyone except me.  But I just couldn’t understand why he would say that all of a sudden. So that made me upset.  And I started acting rude to him. I would tell him to fuck off when he would message me. Because I was so scared of getting hurt. I tried to push him away as fast as I could. Then he still kept messaging. Then I told him I was seeing a guy who was my on and off boyfriend. I told him the guy understood me. But I guess he didn’t believe me. He still kept calling me babe. That was the beginning of the end. We fought. Then, I did something stupid. Even though I knew it was already bad. I decided to have sex with him. We went out for drinks. Hung out together. He said he had fun. I said I did too. Then he dissappears for one day. And then messages me saying hey babe after one day. And I told him I was out with an ex to watch a movie. And that was the conversation for that day. Then, he messaged after two did as.  This time I just replied saying I’m not your babe and so you do remember me? And his reply was he already told me he didnt want commitment. And that was the end of the conversation. But he still kept in touch. Then I just retaliated. Saying things like don’t take to me. But we once tried being friends but I couldn’t at the end of the day because I was hurt. And kept on being rude. The last call we had was where I poured out all I felt and he asked me. What do I want? And I said I don’t know. He got pissed off and told me that why would I want to talk to him just to get revenge. But I was so scared to tell him I wanted him. The fear of being rejected. Then later on I was the one messaging him. But I figured it was best to move on. Atleast he didn’t tell me to fuck of. But he was always polite. The last time I asked him a question which I wasn’t prepared for the answer. I asked him if he was seeing antone.  He said yes but not like the bf and gf thing. That was the last straw for me. Maybe I take offense when a guy says he doesn’t want to commit. But I believed that if a guy said he didn’t want to commit. He jus wanted a for fuck buddy. I definitely wasn’t willing to be that kind of person. I lost my virginity to a guy who just wasn’t right for me but I have learnt from it. I later on went on to have a rebound sex with my on and off boyfriend. Whom I have cut of ties from ever since. I may not have absolutely been the nices person. But he made me so insecure because of his statement. Everything was perfect till the mention of commitment. I just feel that maybe he wanted to have someone who was available when he wasnt busy working. I couldn’t just be in that sort of relationship. I wish the new girl all the best. And now I wonder why I didn’t take it seriously when he said he had been with 5 girls in a short time span. Well experience does teach you a lot.

4 Replies to “When a guy says he doesn’t want to commit.”

  1. Very good article. I am so glad you shared your experiences with us, your readers. Thank you. I guess we all learn lessons from our past. Although what happened to you sounds horrible trust me it will make you strong – that is what all my personal life experiences made me…. and I know it will be the same for you too

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Yes. It has taught me a lot. Actually it made me more of a productive person. I started blogging. I am more in a happy space and I have taken this experience. Looked at what was wrong. And learnt from it. And you are right. It has made me stronger.

      Liked by 1 person

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: