My addiction to clash of clans.

Clash of clans is one game that I have been glued to for the past 3-4 months. It’s basically waking up, checking on my clan,retrieving my golds/elixir,taking my troops on a battle mission, clear my village so I could get some gems, make sure to attack a village within my strength, win or lose ( I most definitely love to win lol ), put another set of troops loading, till then I wait. Then the same process again and again.

 

For those who don’t play clash of clans, it might sound boring. Like naahhh. I couldn’t do that. But those who do, yes you guys, you know what the addiction feels like. I tell my friends ( girls and boys included) , I would have thought that this was kind off like a boys dream game. Like go kill some people, steal some golds,  destroy a village….. pretty badass right?  But to some of my guy friends. They don’t get my addiction. They just wonder what joy I get in it. And I’m like always super pumped up to talk about it with all my strength. 

I know there are many, like billions of people around the globe that play clash of clans.  But I haven’t really met any of them yet. But, I know that I could chat up with them though on the game, sadly some contents aren’t really up to my taste. But yeah. I wish I had more friends that loved Coc just like I do. Are there any clash of clans addicts too. If you are. Holla up here. Haha. Would love to hear about your addiction and feel the mutual excitement that we share for this awesome awesome awesome game. 

I told a friend the other day that I never felt more empowered like how I feel when I destroy some really great villages. Steal a huge amount of gold from them. Get the complete star (3 stars). And feel awesome lol. It just makes me feel badass. For those who haven’t played it yet. Trust me once you do, you are never going to stop. I’m pretty surprised that though I’m not a patient person ( you have to be with coc ). I am still addicted. Because I love this game so much, I’m really patient when it comes to the troops loading ( it doesn’t really take forever, but yes takes time). At first, I would get impatient and use up all my gems but then I realised I nedeed the gems to get more builders. Hahaha. If you are not a coc player…you might just be wondering what the hell she saying. Well coc rocks. I’m going to keep on playing till eternity. 
Have a nice day. #postaday

I decided to stop dating.

Right from the age of 13 I have been in and out of several relationships. Back then it was more of a fun thing to do. You meet a boy you like, you start dating. Baam! We call eachother boyfriend and girlfriend. I never really had this feeling of depth to it. Most of the time, my relationships never went beyond a year because for me I approached relationships in a childish way.
I would break up with a guy because he didn’t call me on my birthday. I really had my perception of a relationship in the wrong concept. After dating up to 20 something guys from 13 years to now 20 years old. I realised that I have actually never been alone. I was scared of being alone. Whenever I would decide to not get into another relationship, I would end up getting into one. I realised this had consumed me so much that I didn’t even know who I was. I couldn’t stand being with myself. I started thinking maybe I didn’t love me. 

I started craving to get to know me. I wanted to be in a relationship with myself.  Many people would call me crazy but I needed to be alone. I prayed to God to help me. Yes, I did. It was that serious. It took God a while because I was still getting involved with guys. But, it took God to break me with the last guy i dated to get me out of the mess I was in. He made me realise that it was time. When God wants to get you out of something, he sometimes makes you go through the hard way. I was heart broken. But now I see the reason why it happened. I am in the best position I ever wanted to be. Growing my relationship with God. He is helping me to love myself.  To love my own company.  He has made me realise that In order for me to love someone else or be in a relationship with someone. I need to know what I want. I need to know me. I need to love me. Most of all I need to love him and I need to have a successful relationship with him. 
Being single is not a misery. It is a gift. It gives you the opportunity  to get to know someone worth knowing that is yourself and God. It makes you productive. Helps you focus on being a better you. Sometimes, one needs to be alone to allow God to manifest in your life. Being alone helps God to teach you all you need to know about the perfect man he has in store for you. He makes you prepared and help you recognise the man that he has made to walk with you through life. As I wait for that man , God is by my side.

Has anyone gone through this phase? Or is it just me. The I-don’t-want-to-date anymore-phase-because-I-want-to-date -myself. Or maybe everyone has a different reason why they don’t date anymore. This is just my reason.

I’m just not into birthdays anymore.

Yesteryday was my birthday. June,19th, 2017. Yeah! Wohooo!. There was once upon a time where birthdays mattered a lot. I would be counting the days as it was getting closer and closer. The rush you get from the wait is something that I can’t describe. So much anxiety. Lol. I would already start thinking about people who are supposed to wish me without fail.

 

If they forgot, yes they would be in deep trouble with me ( such intensity). The birthday gifts are the best of all. You want everyone to give you presents. You pray to God, give him a list of things you want him to make people to give you. Ha. Funny I know. But when you get older. Is it getting less exciting? Do you wakeup not even remembering sometimes until you get people wishes on your phone or on facebook? Then you realise oh! Oops! It’s my birth day!  Then you go back to your routing for the day. I wokeup not feeling like anything special. Birthdays are overrated now. I went to college. Had my friends wish me. Came home. Replied to all my birthday wishes ( thank God people remembered hahahaha). Cut the cake with family. Went to sleep early. Well, it went good. Not much drama. Just very simple and nice. Maybe it’s because of age I feel this way. But I guess everyone is different. It’s not that I don’t recognise it but I can do without it. A friend told me that she decided to not have her birthday date on facebook so that peoplw dont know but on her birthday no one wished her ( yeah people get to know your birthday because of the Facebook notification lol, thank you facebook) and she felt really bad. I guess maybe if people didn’t wish me I would feel bad. But, I feel less attached to my birthday as I’m getting older.

 

Some people don’t even acknowledge it ( people like my father who wouldn’t wish me because he didn’t believe in it and when we cut the cake in front of him. He still didn’t sing) . So that is to show that there are people who don’t even want to acknowledge it. But we still have to respect their decision. Birthdays are awesome. But I guess growing up isn’t.  You gain more responsibility.  Pepole will remind you how old you are when you do something immature.  You can’t act immature no more. Atleast that is what I think. I feel I have gained another year which means more maturity. More reasons to be responsible. I don’t know if it is what happens when you cross your 20 and you start thinking philosophical about everything and anything. So yeah. I’m just not into birthdays anymore. But, I love to eat my chocolate almond cakes. Ha.